The Ability to Change

It always amazes me when people change. In a different crowd, I would probably complain about people’s addictions to drugs or sex or alcohol. But in my circles, too often I encounter people who complain and complain about how annoyed they get with people on Facebook. I tell them, you could just stop reading Facebook. They feign consideration of my idea and then go back to complaining about their heated arguments on Facebook.

My mom told me the other day, if my dad would just stop pestering her, then she could get her Bible study homework done. And she went on a diatribe about her life and the interruptions and the lack of support. It was really weird to me. My brother tried to get my mom to listen to a podcast about stopping procrastinating once and we laughed a bit because my mom does not procrastinate. She gets things done. If someone should be able to change, it should be her. If someone won’t tolerate excuses, it’s her. So it’s weird to hear her…excuses.

I’ve been lucky in not starting vices. I don’t do much social media – I instagram once a week. Never smoked. With the exception of law school loans, never been in debt. Not a big drinker. Can’t stand too much caffeine. No drugs. Never been overweight.

So it seems that I’m not in a place where a drastic change makes sense. And I wonder, even if I were, if I’d be able to. If I started taking drugs, would I have the strength to quit? I don’t think so. People who lose a ton of weight, quit smoking, quit drinking, pay back big loans – people who drastically change their lives for the better –
those people are superheroes.
If you’re someone who’s done one of those things, I think you’re a superhero. For what it’s worth. Probably isn’t worth much

Of course, when I was younger I tried a lot of new things. I got a pixie cut. I moved to China. I was a vegetarian for a year.

Those were fun things. Change seems to become more difficult when we’re adults. I think there may be more pressure to settle down and be set in your ways. There seem to be more advice columns telling us that people can’t change. Maybe we all just lose our optimism. We’ve resigned ourselves to this way of living.

But I’ve met people who’ve turned it all around. People who’ve gone from fat to jacked. People who’ve gone to AA. And because I’m a lawyer, I know a ton of people who have switched careers. And they give me hope. If you can change, then maybe I can change. Maybe people can change. Maybe there’s hope for all of us yet.

Have you ever made a big change in your life? Are you my superhero?

Leave a Reply