The Ugly Truth about Frugality

I haven’t done many diets because I hate the idea of restriction. I lasted about 4 days on a no-carbs diet and they were some of the most miserable days of my life. But one that has stuck is the “one meal a day” diet.

I started by skipping breakfast. That was quite easy. I immediately didn’t miss it. Skipping lunch was much more difficult and I could feel the hunger eating (haha) me alive. But it got easier as my body adjusted. And the hunger would subside after 15 minutes, max. And when I finally eat my meal of the day – dinner – I eat without abandon. There are no restrictions. There is always dessert. So it seems like a joyous celebration rather than a constant level of restriction.

I think the parallels to personal finance speak for themselves. I look at other people’s spending, and I’m pretty shocked about the constant frittering of money.

For me, I’m pretty used to wanting something and not buying it. It seems that for a lot of these people, that’s not how they do it. They get the itch and they scratch. I get the itch, and I store the itch in a file and revisit the itch in a week.

Frugality often reminds me of my diet. I’ve heard supermodels complain that they’re always hungry. The truth about frugality is that it often feels like you’re hungry all the time as well. Frugality means you just ignore these “hunger” pangs. If you think about frugality as a whole, you’ll feel like you are constantly living in a state of desire and denial. You’re always craving.

Sometimes you’ll feel like you’re deprived. Sometimes you’ll feel like you don’t have enough. You will have a list of things a mile long on your “to buy” list. That’s just the truth of denying what you want. It doesn’t get easier. Unless you have a way to tune out all marketing, there will always be new things that make you itch for more.

Of course, giving in to your desires isn’t what you truly want. The problem with scratching every itch is that your skin will be all scratched up. The problem with eating whenever your hunger strikes is that you’ll often eat too much. You don’t recognize the signals to stop eating anymore and you may start mistaking signals for thirst or boredom for hunger. And as your weight balloons, you start to worry about every time you eat, trying to restrict at all times. Sometimes it’s better to restrict from the get-go.

The upside of ignoring your desires is that 90% of the desires will go away and often quite quickly. And rather than having a lot of products that you can barely remember desiring, you’ll have a fat checking account.

It reminds me of co-opting and bastardizing Steve Jobs’ graduation speech motto, “Stay hungry. Stay foolish.” But here, “Stay hungry. The hunger will go away.” The caveat is though, you still remember to eat and when you do eat, relish every moment of it.

[I thought about submitting this article idea to a personal finance site but figured it would get a lot of backlash because the idea of restricting one’s meals is basically as unpopular as saying “Trump’s doing a good job.” People will accuse you of encourage eating disorders. Meanwhile, we’re facing an obesity epidemic in conjunction with widespread malnourishment. To the extent this counts as advice, it only applies to people who don’t have an eating disorder. Please take care of yourselves. ]

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “The Ugly Truth about Frugality

  1. “For me, I’m pretty used to wanting something and not buying it. It seems that for a lot of these people, that’s not how they do it. They get the itch and they scratch. I get the itch, and I store the itch in a file and revisit the itch in a week….. The truth about frugality is that it often feels like you’re hungry all the time as well. Frugality means you just ignore these “hunger” pangs. If you think about frugality as a whole, you’ll feel like you are constantly living in a state of desire and denial. You’re always craving.”

    This is fascinating to me and I don’t think I’ve ever heard it put this way before. I am naturally frugal and my partner is the opposite and I think this gives me more of an insight into his brain. I don’t really feel that sense of hunger/denial for myself but I do feel it whenever it falls to me to say no to him and make the call not to spend on something for us/the household, whatever. I’m great at denying myself and it doesn’t hurt but I struggle so much to deny my loved ones.

    Like

  2. That’s great that you’re so naturally frugal! I think most of the time I’m fine but every now and then I think – I really want a new dress. I’m sure we all just have different capacities for desire and denial and I’m glad you found this helpful in understanding your partner.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s